Learning

We talked about autism today in my Thinking and Problem-Solving course, in terms of how autistic individuals, varying depending on where on the spectrum they may be, go about reasoning and solving problems. I was especially eager to see how autism is perceived by German university students, and really perked up when another student mentioned that he had worked with autistic children in the past. It was difficult to suppress an overzealous "Me too! Me too!" We also discussed how the thought process of an autistic individual is in fact deviant (with taxation, ability to find correlations), and then again, how we can't really know for sure, except through experiments that in the end are still flawed, because you can't access a person's inner thoughts.

Good news: I spoke up in class, and understood the highly complex text, and could really follow the conversation! My presentation is not until January 19th, and that gives me so much hope. The professor is really kind and is good at provoking the students, as we need much prodding to begin the discussion, but everyone is very humorous, intelligent and detail-oriented once they open up. The language barrier is definitely tangible, but it is not as much as a hinderance for me as I had feared. Many psychological terms are very similar in English and German and the methods are practically identical.

In my Contemporary Literature course we are reading Der Vorleser, and I am ridiculously enthused about it. The relationship between the two main characters is especially interesting, scandalous and racy, and the way the story is told - with small clues throughout that are so gratifying to notice - is very intellectual and also thrilling.

I am learning plenty outside of class too and having a lot of fun. It is so strange that I felt very "grown-up" before coming here and only just now am learning to truly let go and enjoy myself and the people around me more than ever before. I want to capture my happiness today and keep it forever, but I think it was just me feeling like myself again, and I think that is a pattern that will continue.

It is strange to make these important self-discoveries simultaneously and on a different continent. There is so much questioning, rejoicing in learning, and sometimes painful trial and error.

Maybe this is just what being 20 is?

If you will humor a little self-indulgence, I think a major reason behind why I am suddenly ridiculously happy is that I am feeling very intelligent for the first time since... probably high school. I always felt somewhat intelligent at Lewis & Clark, but now I have this opportunity to exercise my intellect (sounds lovely, hmm?) in a foreign language, and I am just surprised by how quickly the brain can interpret these new words and make sense of everything.